Warhorse



This Horse Is A God Damn Omen

Okay so right from the start, let me get something clear, any movie that tries to personify a animal so audiences care and cry over it loses me, I find it quite a cheap trick Hollywood uses to push our buttons and it works, a lot, sitting in the cinema with a lot of people weeping is living proof of that. So I was hesitant at first when asked to review this movie, I felt I wasn’t going to give it the fair and emotional critique that it deserves.

The movie is Warhorse, a heavily powerful emotional and touching World War One movie, that revolves around a horse, well, the horse and it’s owner, but it concentrates more on the horse. It starts with Young Albert (Jeremy Irvine) who is always shown to be taking an unnatural interest in horses, after his grandfather tries to outbid his landlord (his RICH landlord, don’t ask how or why he thought he'll win) he finds himself with a horse of his own. The first hour of this movie is this boy and his horse bonding, and whereas I wasn’t bored, it wasn’t gripping me and making me want to see more, in fact, the show was stolen by a goose in my opinion.
Due to some money troubles the horse is then sold into the cavalry, cue emotional crying part 1 of many. At this point, the movie starts to pick up, it cleverly shows the horrific war through the eyes of this horse and the many people whose life’s it touches. The only disappointment I had during this movie was the sudden disappearance of the Goose.
Go watch this movie, and go ball your eyes out.
Another side note. Rumors that the Goose fell in love with a dragon, and mated to create the first Dragoose have been unconfirmed.

Danny

Danny@Dragoose.co.uk

Zombieland



Welcome to the United States Of Zombieland

WOW, after all the zombie related movies/books/games being thrown at us it is amazing to me that we haven't grown sick of them, and then Zombieland comes along, it shows us that zombie movies are still great. Zombieland is set in a world that has been overrun by zombies, Jesse Eisenberg (Adventureland.) plays Columbus, a loner with a long list of strict rules that have kept him alive this long, he is soon picked up by Woody Harrelsons (Murderball, No Country For Old Men) character Tallahassee, Tallahassee is the complete opposite of the Columbus character, he has no set of rules, he has survived because he is a bad-ass, as Columbus says “ Tallahassee was in the ass-kicking business and... business was good.” This post apocalyptic odd-couple then run into two sisters Wichita and Little Rock, played by Emma Stone (Superbad, Paperman) and Abigail Breslin ( Little Miss Sunshine) the sisters are con artist and have survived by trusting no-one and swindling every survivor they come across. As for the plot, there isn't much to go on, Tallahassee spends his the entire movie looking for a Twinkie and the sisters plan on going to a theme park after hearing rumours that it is zombie free, the plot is unimportant, it is the characters relationships that make this movie so great. All the performances are great, Eisenberg plays his hermit character well, Harrelson is the strongest link in his movie, his lines are so quotable and it is fantastic to watch him attempt to get Zombie Kill Of The Week. Stone is stunning and plays her girl next door role perfectly, Breslin is already showing how great of a actress she is at such a young age, she is certainly one to look out for in the future.

A MUST WATCH

Danny Baker

Danny@dragoose.co.uk

SuckerPunch



Zack Snyder has brought his personal
spank bank to the big screen!

There are going to be two kinds of people that are going to read this review, the first will read that I actually like this movie and flood the comment page with essays about how wrong I am. And the second who won't agree with me, but respect that I like a movie they don't. If there is a third kind of person who is reading this and enjoyed the movie as well then congratulations on perfecting human cloning and creating a second me, because I seem to be the only person alive other then Zack Snyder who likes this film. The film is Sucker Punch, a film that takes the premise of Inception and performs it with 5 beautiful women. It starts with Babydoll (Emily Browning) who is wrongly institutionalized and is to be lobotomised in 5 days. She escapes this reality by imagining herself as a newbie in a brothel, when forced to perform erotic dances she escapes to another fantasy where she...look, if you have read up on the little bit of a clusterfuck that is this movie you will know about the action packed fantasies that Babydoll has to escape the brothel/institution, this is the biggest selling point of the movie, but unfortunately it is also the biggest flaw in it. In each of the fantasies Babydoll and her team of beautiful ass-kickers are seemingly omnipotent, they can deflect bullets with a thin blade, they can take on dragons, undead nazi's, mechanical droids, all without breaking a sweat, this takes away all danger. There is still a danger in the real world in the form of the “High Roller” who is to appear in 5 days to take Babydolls virginity, and there is a real danger in the institute, but I was never worried for any of these girls whenever they were taking on armies of undead, it would make more sense for this movie to not cut away to these fantasies and keep the audiences on the edge of their seats while Babydoll danced.

Zack Snyder is starting to get famous for his slow-mo action scenes, and for the first few fantasies I accepted that he was doing what he does “best”but towards the end I was getting tired of them, and it seemed so was he as the last few fantasies seemed rushed, I found myself once again preferring to see Babydoll dance then watch her fight.

I do accept that this is either Zack Snyders wet dream brought to the big screen or a very long music video that he shot but I still like this movie, I found myself emotionally invested with Babydoll, I enjoyed the bittersweet ending which went well with the soundtrack (aside from the abomination that is the queen mash up.) I would suggest renting it rather then buying it full price as I know it won't be to a lot of peoples liking, and I don't want to be blamed for you spending your hard earned money.

Danny Baker

Danny@dragoose.co.uk

Street Dance 3D

Take a hot girl, doesn't matter if she can act but make sure she can dance, once you have one, congratulations, you now have a female lead in your dance movie, now rinse and repeat for your male lead, I call it the “Step Up Rule” and this is the only part that Street Dance 3D does actually step up too, because I can't begin to explain how gorgeous Nichola Burnley is. She plays Carly, who is left in charge of her street dance crew after her dick of her boyfriend bails right before the finals. Due to her spunky attitude she manages to impress Charlotte Rampling's character and secure a room in her prestigious ballet school, but there is a catch, Carly must include 5 of the schools best ballet students in her act. If all this mixing ballet and street dance together seems familiar, then chances are you have probably watched Step Up, this movie does feel like a low budget version of a Step Up movie but with some very welcome British humour, unfortunately Street Dance doesn't fulfil what I want from a decent dance movie, the dancing never blows you away, sure they are talented but nothing that will wow the audience, which is surprising considering the dancers that appear in the movie. Diversity is advertised as practically staring in the movie but only appear as a cameo, Flawless are built up throughout the movie as being the best street dancers in the UK, but even there performances are forgettable and a little dull. Of course this will disappoint the 99% of people watching this for the dancing, but not the 1% of people who will now check out the movie to see Nichola Burnley.              



There you go 1%, I just saved you time.

As for the performances, they all do a great job of being the archetypical characters we have all seen in other dance movies, we have the love interest, the stuck up teachers at the ballet school, who don't understand street dance and much prefer to teach ballet with the stick that has been lodged up there arses, the sassy black best friend, and the dickish boyfriend who takes the reward for being the dumbest villain ever. SPOILOR His master plan is to stop sleeping with his gorgeous girlfriend ( Carly) so he can join another dance group, and go up against her at the finals.

As I mentioned in my Step Up 3D review, I have always avoided dance movies, I assumed they were movies with no plot broken up with boring dance routines and horrible dialogue and if it wasn't for Step Up 3D blowing me away last year this movie would confirm my thoughts. I would still recommend this to a fan of dance movies, but with a lacklustre finale in which they dubstep classical music you would have to be a real hardcore lover of these movies to enjoy this one.

Danny Baker

Danny@dragoose.co.uk

Push



A lot of PUSH, not a lot of pulling power

To start this review I would like to say that this movie is a PUSH in the right direction...

...Okay now thats out the way, time to review this thing.

Another movie, another world in which people with special powers are hunted down by shadowy organisations, we have seen this so many times that Push is almost in danger of being a cliché. But from what Push borrows from similar stories such as X-Men and Heroes it adds it's own little quirks that save it from the bargain bins.

For a start unlike Heroes and X-Men, Push nicknames the powers we have seen a thousand times before in the world of Sci-Fi, Movers can move objects with their minds, Watchers can see the future, Pushers can put thoughts into others heads, these are only a few examples of quite a vast range of special powers. Push also comes with a great cast, now they may not have the pulling power that X-Men has and acquire prestigious actors like Sir Ian McKellen but Chris Evans holds his own as the main protagonist, Dakota Fanning also gets to show the audience how great a young actress she really is by playing a very independent but scared 13 year old. The beautiful Camilla Belle plays the girl everyone is racing to find, she does a great job of changing between being a bad ass fighter to a very confused and scared victim.

The relationship between Evans and Fannings works really well as the film sends across a message about the importance of family, both characters still have mental scars about the loss of a family member so it is warming to see Fannings character go from being treated as a nuisance to her being almost like a little sister or daughter to Evans, exactly like Logan and Rogue have in X-Men.

Push does come with a few flaws though, it likes to try and build tension by having Fannings character constantly see a future in which they all die, but with Fannings seemingly omnipotent mother sending strangers to help our heroes, the tension never really gets a chance to fully form into genuine concern for the characters well being.

"My mother better hurry and send help
because I'm getting sick of drawing dead people"

Putting the flaws aside, Push does do a great job off balancing the powers, they still have great special effects and amazing fight scenes but half of Hong Kong isn't blown up like it would be in other Sci-Fi films, instead it shows the characters using their powers to make a bit of money and too cheat and con other people, they are shown to be quite sleazy, but when you find out how dangerous the Division is, you forgive the sleaziness and don't hold it against them. Push isn't all doom and gloom, it comes with moments of humour, particularly one scene in which a blind drunk Dakota Fanning stumbles about the apartment in a bid to add clarity to her visions of the future.

All in all Push is a very smart film with interesting characters, a very engaging premise, a unique take on special abilities we seen before and some great twists and turns, all that add up to make a very entertaining film that will keep you watching, without the help of a pusher.

Danny Baker

Danny@dragoose.co.uk

The Expendables

The Expendables tells the story of a group of mercenaries who are hired to take on suicidal missions , one particular suicidal mission includes them going into a foreign land and kill the dictator running the place. But of course it doesn't matter about the plot, because that isn't what is going to sell this movie, the selling point of the movie is the huge cast of action stars. We have Stallone, Li, Statham, Lundgren, Crews, Rourke, Austin, and we are promised Willis and Schwarzenegger but they are little more than a cameo appearance. This is of course a huge selling point, everyone is always going to be excited with a cast like this, but it also works against the film, there are too many characters in the film leaving it impossible to develop all the characters, Jason Statham comes of as the best developed character as we are able to delve into a little bit of his personal life, Stallone has a little bit of character when we see him interact with Tool (played by Mickey Rourke), Jet Li gets a few scenes to develop and no time is left for the others. This doesn't stop the fun of course, the action is amazing and there are a lot of funny dialogue between the group. Terry Crews holds his own as a action star although I much prefer him in comedy roles, Jet Li fits into the group as the martial arts expert, Lundgren is as crazy as ever and the villains are laughably cartoony.

All in all I do recommend going out and seeing this movie, or at the very least rent and watch it with a group of friends, the majority of friends I watched it with enjoyed the movie (one friend was disappointed with the lack of Arnie)

Danny Baker

Danny@dragoose.co.uk

D.O.A

OK so this may not be anywhere near to a Oscar nomination (the picture to the right demonstrates that.) but I really have fun with this movie. There isn't much to comment on, one review of the movie pretty much sums it up. “ Half naked babes Kung-fu fighting...sit back, relax and enjoy.” This is so true, there's action and there's bikinis...and...well thats about it, but that is all they need with a movie like this. I am not saying this is the type of movie that is so bad it's good, no, the action is extremely engaging, the dialogue has it's wit and charm at times, and the women look good, and act well. It never takes itself to seriously and it puts little tributes to the game franchise for the fans to enjoy, such as the volleyball scene.

 

The story is about 3 beautiful but deadly fighters, all trained in there own unique style and who all get invited to a fighting competition called D.O.A to slug it out for a $10m cash prize. We have the very proud and noble Princess Kasumi played by Devon Aoki (2 Fast 2 Furious, Sin City), the sultry master thief Christie played by Holly Valance (Yes the singer but don't let that put you off, she is a good actress.), and finally the sexy superstar pro-wrestler Tina Armstrong played by Jamie Pressly (My Name Is Earl) These three start as enemies but soon team up to uncover the tournaments sinister secret.

You will not regret buying this movie and sitting back with some friends and watching it.

Danny Baker

Danny@dragoose.co.uk



Batman: Under The Red Hood

 Batman, Nightwing, The Joker, Black Mask, Robin, Red Hood. If any of these characters are making you want to stop reading this review and go and watch them then I don't blame you, this movie is fantastic, probably one of the best animated DC movie to come out. I am of course talking about Batman: Under The Red Hood, the latest animated movie to be released by DC, and I will reiterate again, it is one of the best. It starts with Batman hot on the trial of The Joker who has kidnapped Jason Todd aka Robin The Boy Wonder, Batman gets there too late and the Joker manages to torture and kill Robin. 5 Years later and Batman is reluctant to take on a new partner, but when a new and mysterious enemy calling himself The Red Hood starts to gain a reputation in the criminal world, Batman must team up with Nightwing to take him down. With explosive action and a compelling story, this is a must buy movie. The voice cast in this movie is phenomenal, Bruce Greenwood does a terrific job on his gruff Batman voice but never a Christian Bale, over the top gruff voice that will put you off. Neil Patrick Harris provides the voice for Dick Grayson aka Nightwing, and once again proves why he is the go to guy for a movie like this. Jensen Ackles shines as the voice talent for The Red Hood, and John DiMaggio voices the ever crazy Joker, although he is no Mark Hamill when it comes to the Joker he still does a great job.

Danny Baker

Danny@dragoose.co.uk

Step Up 3D

I have never been a fan of any Step Up film, and no matter how hard a close friend would try to convince me that they were worth watching, I have never budged on my opinion of the franchise. Until now. Now don’t get me wrong it has flaws, big gaping flaws that nearly threaten to tear through the film and ruin it for everyone, the plot is so predictable it is almost boring and pointless to call everything that is about to happen because everyone in the cinema already knows. In one of the first scenes we hear our main protagonist say to his parents. “I am done with dancing.” I immediately turned to one of my friends and predicted that within 5 seconds, this guy would be dancing, and sure enough 5 seconds later he gets pushed into a street dance. And that is when I started to love this film, with such a weak plot everyone knew that they would have to make the most fantastic dance scenes and put them on the big screen, and they do, each dance scene knocks it right out the park with both ingenious and near impossible moves and clever ways to incorporate the 3D element, which is really worth while with this movie. The plot follows a group of dancers who must compete in a competition to raise enough money to keep their home, and now you have probably predicted the rest of the entire movie, but don’t let that stop you from going to watch it. As for the cast, the only person in the film I actually related too was a character called “Moose” (played by Adam Servani) I didn’t feel anything for his storyline (if you can call it that.) because it was just as dull and predictable as all the other plot elements, but every time he was on the screen he was playing such a likeable everyday guy ( o.k. an everyday guy that can pull of some amazing dance moves but nevertheless.) that it was impossible not to like him.

I fully recommend this movie, sit through the dull 10 minutes of dialogue that springs up every now and again and I assure you that there will be an amazing dance scene waiting for you.

Danny Baker

Danny@dragoose.co.uk